Why we adopt

Over the course of our adoption journey we’ve been asked several times, “why are you adopting?” I’ve asked myself that question over and over again. I guess to a lot of people its not normal, its only something that “those” people do. Why would you take someone into your family that’s not from your own blood? Why would you risk so many unknown factors that would or could put your family at risk? What if you adopt a kid you can't handle? Those are somewhat legitimate questions.

Adopting a child doesn’t go without risks. There are risks. We might take in a child that has disabilities, mental or physical. There might be severe needs. There might be issues that as an infant won’t be caught and as the child grows will be discovered. It might cause us to change living locations, jobs, countries, our way of life. So then why? Why risk ruining a good thing?

I was sitting in Hong Kong a year and a half ago reading a book by Dr. Martin Lloyd-Jones. It was a collection of sermons he preached at Westminster on Sunday nights through the course of his ministry there. One chapter in particular moved me. He wasn’t talking about adoption at all but about the Lord’s Supper. He started with our part in the new covenant, the very thing that the Lord’s Supper is supposed to symbolize. How are we apart of the new covenant? Basically Ephesians 1:3-14 tells us:

3 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places,

4 even as he chose us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before him. In love

5 he predestined us for adoption through Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will,

6 to the praise of his glorious grace, with which he has blessed us in the Beloved.

7 In him we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of our trespasses, according to the riches of his grace,

8 which he lavished upon us, in all wisdom and insight

9 making known to us the mystery of his will, according to his purpose, which he set forth in Christ

10 as a plan for the fullness of time, to unite all things in him, things in heaven and things on earth.

11 In him we have obtained an inheritance, having been predestined according to the purpose of him who works all things according to the counsel of his will,

12 so that we who were the first to hope in Christ might be to the praise of his glory.

13 In him you also, when you heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation, and believed in him, were sealed with the promised Holy Spirit,

14 who is the guarantee of our inheritance until we acquire possession of it, to the praise of his glory.

Not only does the Lord’s Supper remind us what Christ did for us, but what we receive from the cross. We receive not only salvation but an inheritance, His Name becomes ours, we become His children, we partake in His family. We received so much more than forgiveness for our sins, if that weren’t enough. His mercy and grace extend far beyond that, to a restored place as God’s children, co-heirs with Christ! As Lloyd-Jones says it, “Here God is telling me that I am in the new covenant, that I am a child of His, that He has adopted me, that all the blessings and the benefits of the new covenant in Christ belong to me and are coming to me and I thanks God for them at this point. In other words, you should always feel thankful at that service.”

If we are to be people who live and breath the gospel, to live it out, to be transformed by it then we must understand the nature of our being grafted or adopted into God’s family. We receive promises that were not formally ours. We received blessings when we really deserve Hell. We deserve disaster and judgment instead of peace and the Holy Spirit.

So now back to the question, why do we adopt? We adopt because we too have been adopted. We take in little ones into our families because they have no family of their own, no promises, and no blessings. We take in these risks, special needs, and problems, because we do like Christ and accept those who follow him into the churches. We take up the needs of the orphans and widows because He too cares for the needy, the depraved, and the helpless. We too were depraved and helpless in our spiritual state, but nonetheless Christ according to the purpose of His will and to the praise of his glorious grace, with which He has blessed us in the Beloved, adopted us in Christ. We then follow Him and show the world a vivid picture of what the gospel looks like, a reflection or shadow of what is a reality in the spiritual realm. We accept those that aren’t our own as our own based on no merit of their own.   We also adopt because as an act of worship and missions.  We bring the nations into our living room and out of gratefulness for what He's done we proclaim the gospel to those children.  Therefore adopt, as Christ has adopted you.

Spencer

Adopted for Life

 Just finished reading Adopted for Life.  It was great.  My voice cracked and tears filled my eyes every time I quoted parts to Spencer.  He would probably say I quoted half the book to him and now ruined the read for him.  To be sure, we adopt because we have been adopted.  Because God is about deliverance, restoration and making people whole. 

Because He is about taking a sinner undeserving of grace and making him an heir with an amazing inheritance.  We want to be like our God and be bringing about His kingdom in ways that mirror Jesus’ ministry.  We want to be about taking care of widows and orphans.  I am grateful to God that we have had the opportunity to adopt.  I know it will change our lives as any new addition to a family does.  I pray that it will be for our sanctification and his salvation.      

I am glad that Russell Moore has written this book.  I do hope that there will be an increase in Christian families who adopt.  What a testimony to the lost world for Christians to care for the helpless.  So much of what he says rings true to our experience.  Its about a lot of little things that lead you to want to adopt, prepare you to adopt.  A lot of little decisions to be made along the way.  Lots of paperwork to be filled out along the way - but with the help of an agency and it comes in waves.  Lots of things to consider – but there are good books to be read.  Lots of money involved – but again paid in little chunks along the way.  Its not as daunting as it all seems.  We are after all in the last few months of the process and we have made it thru just fine!  More than that.  Our kids are ecstatic, we can hardly wait to go get him and I am already starting to feel like he is in our family and has been in our hearts all along!  Get this – I am even ready to do it again!  Pray for us!  Doing it again will make us broke for sure!  Really pray for us!  I am feeling more confident now and equipped and moved to adopt a special needs child or an older child that is not likely to be adopted by most parents.  Not sure if God will have this happen but if so, I trust He would give us what we need to handle it.  Some of you know Spencer and I both have had a longing to parent a child with Down Syndrome for a very long time.  I am just thrilled to be given the opportunity to be mom again AND to display the love and grace of Christ in this unique way!  

If you want to buy it here's where you can:  http://www.monergismbooks.com/Adopted-for-Life-The-Priority-of-Adoption-for-Christian-Families-and-Churches-p-18407.html

Veronica 

AJAY

Its been November 08 since I last updated this blog. Wow I feel like we are a different family now in so many ways. We aren't living in the place that we were in for the last 9+ years. Instead we live in a tropical wonderland. It’s a great place and full of interesting people. There are many nationalities here and the diversity is evident everywhere on the street. We are enjoying it so far. The circumstances that got us weren't the most fun days of our lives. But we see His hand in it all and trust that it was for our good and His glory. I trust that he had us there for so long to refine some areas in our lives and shape us into the people He desires us to be.

Also another major change is that our adoption process isn't just a bunch of paperwork any longer. In February 2009 we finished all the paperwork and began waiting. Then in April when we "had" to move we thought that for sure our adoption process would be delayed. In some ways it was but He used it for good and knew what we needed as a family. On May 27, 2009 while checking email over at some friends house we got the email about a little boy named Ajay. Veronica and I knew right away that this little Indian boy was to be a Stringer.